We have all had that uncanny feeling that we are living our lives in a movie, usually it's Groundhog's Day -- or 8 1/2 if you fancy yourself an artist. But what if the truth is that you are stuck in a movie? Worse yet, what if that movie is by Stanley Kubrick?
Check out this list of common symptoms to determine whether you suffer from this disturbing, albeit aesthetically pleasing, affliction.
1) The settings of your life consist of stark white walls, blinding white light sources, and one red couch.
2) You repeatedly find yourself in stilted and monotone conversations on banal subjects.
4) You repeatedly find yourself in horrifying conversations conducted in a stilted, monotone, and banal manner.
5) You discover your humanity/individuality is slowly being crushed by malevolent forces beyond your control.
6) Your commute to work perfectly synchronizes with The Blue Danube Waltz.
7) You're possessed by the sneaking suspicion of being constantly followed by a man with a steadicam.
8) To your surprise, you find that your Mother-in-Law, that scary German guy at work, and your well-intentioned British friend are all actually Peter Sellers.
9) Some loud-mouth in a position of authority follows you around screaming colorfully about how worthless you are.
10) Several years of your life are connected only by a single, yet potently meaningful jump-cut.
If you suffer from 4- 6 of these symptoms, chances are that you are indeed stuck in a Stanley Kubrick film.
While there is no known cure for this affliction, side-effects may include: brainwashing, turning into an axe-murderer, turning into a space-baby, walking in perfect time to classical music, and nuclear holocaust.
Note: A sense that your computer is out to get you and/or attempting to kill your computer are perfectly normal reactions to modern life and may not be true indications of being trapped in a Kubrick film.
Check out this list of common symptoms to determine whether you suffer from this disturbing, albeit aesthetically pleasing, affliction.
1) The settings of your life consist of stark white walls, blinding white light sources, and one red couch.
2) You repeatedly find yourself in stilted and monotone conversations on banal subjects.
4) You repeatedly find yourself in horrifying conversations conducted in a stilted, monotone, and banal manner.
5) You discover your humanity/individuality is slowly being crushed by malevolent forces beyond your control.
6) Your commute to work perfectly synchronizes with The Blue Danube Waltz.
7) You're possessed by the sneaking suspicion of being constantly followed by a man with a steadicam.
8) To your surprise, you find that your Mother-in-Law, that scary German guy at work, and your well-intentioned British friend are all actually Peter Sellers.
9) Some loud-mouth in a position of authority follows you around screaming colorfully about how worthless you are.
10) Several years of your life are connected only by a single, yet potently meaningful jump-cut.
If you suffer from 4- 6 of these symptoms, chances are that you are indeed stuck in a Stanley Kubrick film.
While there is no known cure for this affliction, side-effects may include: brainwashing, turning into an axe-murderer, turning into a space-baby, walking in perfect time to classical music, and nuclear holocaust.
Note: A sense that your computer is out to get you and/or attempting to kill your computer are perfectly normal reactions to modern life and may not be true indications of being trapped in a Kubrick film.
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